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NVC Resources on Feelings

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  1. Persisting vs. Demanding

    Persisting vs. Demanding

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 12/21/2014

    Trainer Tip: Persisting without demanding is the art of what Marshall Rosenberg fondly called "Dogging for our needs." We can learn to not give up on our needs and at the same time, refrain from demanding they be met.

  2. Improving Relationships as a Primary Goal

    Improving Relationships as a Primary Goal

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/4/2015

    Trainer Tip: We can improve our relationships by focusing our attention first on connection instead of other stragegies.

  3. What is the Shadow?

    What is the Shadow?

    Eric Bowers

    Articles · 4 - 6 minutes · 2/28/2019

    What parts of yourself or others are hard to embrace, understand or even notice?  What parts do others have difficulty embracing, understanding or noticing?  Why do we condemn, loathe, hate, deny, judge, blame or feel shame around certain needs, feelings and parts of self and/or others? This article talks about the hidden parts of ourselves and others that shapes views and behaviours.

  4. Mourning Our Way to Acceptance

    Mourning Our Way to Acceptance

    Miki Kashtan

    Articles · 7 - 11 minutes · 8/12/2020

    When something happens that we don't like no amount of resentment nor magical thinking will make it disappear. Instead, we can mourn to dissolve our own resistance, resentment, and numbness of resignation. Mourning can allow us to feel pain with acceptance, and without needing to be okay with what happened. Acceptance can bring us to a place where even all the anguish in the world is fully, part of life.

  5. Boundaries

    Boundaries

    The Journey To Being Able To Say "No"

    Elia Lowe-Chardé

    Articles · 5 - 8 minutes · 11/5/2022

    Struggling to say "no"? Here are ways you change your adjacent mind patterns. First, note the differences between those who respect boundaries and those who often don't. Second, review situations in which you lost track of your choice. And rehearse what it would sound, look, and feel like if you kept connection to your choice. Third, seek validation of your experience - from a grounded and mindful (non-reactive) state.

  6. The Facilitator's Role

    The Facilitator's Role

    Mary Mackenzie

    Video · 12 minutes · 02/25/2025

    Listen in as Mary deftly blows the role of facilitator wide open in this excerpt from her very popular 2021 course, Facilitate NVC Groups with Joy and Confidence. She also covers a variety of useful tips such as what to do if you feel lost or confused, how to trust your gut, and ideas around utilizing empathy for yourself!

     
  7. Navigating Tense Conversations

    Navigating Tense Conversations

    Oren Jay Sofer

    Articles · 2 - 3 minutes · 10/5/2020

    Trainer Tip: Here are some options for tense moments in conversations: try a "redo", understand and recognize your habits, pause to regroup, empathize with the person so they feel heard, check your mind frame before speaking, and name some appreciations about one another.

  8. Safe Spaces and Confidentiality Agreements

    Safe Spaces and Confidentiality Agreements

    Roxy Manning

    Video · 4 minutes 7 seconds · 02/16/2023

    Certified CNVC trainer Roxy Manning, Phd, answers a question: how to create a safe space for a first time group working on power and privileges ?

  9. It seems to me that people see ideas which are different from theirs as threatening. Instead of listening, the group polarizes around the different ideas and a lot of judgments develop, conflicts develop and people feel hurt. Forward progress becomes a battle ground. How can I support more collaboration?

  10. Giving feedback can be a difficult task, sometimes we try to avoid getting to the point and instead end up spending a long time attempting to communicate. We find there are mostly two types of feedback. The first focuses on what is wrong with the person's behaviour and tends to feel more judgemental whereas the second is values-based feedback, focusing on the needs of the people involved.

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