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Sometimes I hear people say things like, “I didn’t do Compassionate Communication this week.” Or “I tried Compassionate Communication when I was arguing with my wife last week.” Compassionate Communication is not a thing to do, or to pull out of our bag of tricks once in a while. Compassionate Communication is a consciousness of valuing everyone’s needs and of valuing connection more than being right, winning or protecting ourselves. It is a way of living.

Living Compassion in an Ever-Changing World is the last course that Robert Gonzales offered before his passing in November of 2021. It is an intermediate course whose purpose is to deepen our conscious connection to our own vital life force, to develop skills that support inner healing, and to grow and strengthen daily practices that allow us to truly live life to the fullest.

Judgment is an attempt to protect from hopelessness or insecurity, at high cost. Instead, check in with fear, grief, or hurt. Then wonder what needs are at stake for everyone. This makes space for grief instead of anger, for negotiation rather than control, and for "calling in" rather than excluding. Wonder: “For whom would this be life-serving or not?”, “What strategies would care for all needs?” or, “What can I contribute now?”

In a workshop, a hesitant white neurodivergent man faced a triggering reaction from a Global Majority transgender man. Uncovering their backgrounds, the facilitator addressed family dynamics and exclusion. A repair exercise fostered empathy, challenging assumptions and emphasizing the importance of equitable facilitation for a richer group experience.

Read how an American Buddhist NVC teacher with Jewish roots reflects on how any dehumanization in the Israel-Hamas conflict can be used to justify all kinds of violence that can escalate for generations. With acknowledgment of the complexities, his desire is for us to bring in respect, dignity and peace -- for both Israelis and Palestinians. He emphasizes compassionate advocacy of all humanity amid the ongoing crisis.

Come. Let us journey together into our own authentic Life force: the essential living energy that permeates all of our lives.

Your journey will begin at the center: with the divine / life force, or soul force.

Robert Gonzales shares how this fundamental life energy is the tender expression of your inner being, or soul. It unfolds through the heart as your deepest longings, which manifest themselves in all forms of human needs and values. When you live from the energies of compassion, creativity, love, and clarity – while remaining wholly grounded and aware of needs and values – then you are living your passion… You are living the Self-In-Life.

Distinguishing between needs and strategies to meet needs is crucial for solving conflict. For example, the need for peace can be met through various strategies beyond solitude or gratitude. Similarly, sex is a strategy. Sexual expression is the need behind it, and can be met in various ways to meet that need without having sex itself. Such flexibility can foster  creativity and deeper connection, enhancing relationships.

Inbal speaks to a group about our habit of demanding something of our children but making it sound like a request, the components of a true request and the importance of being honest when making a demand.

No one likes demands. Do you want to have access to choice when requests or demands come your way? Join CNVC Certified Trainer Arnina Kashtan as she provides tools to free yourself from the submit/rebel dynamic.

Trainer Tip: In Nonviolent Communication, we consider love to be a need. Remember that needs are universal; everyone has the same ones. We all need love, but the ways in which we express it can be very different.