NVC Resources on Connection
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CNVC Certified Trainer Miki Kashtan offers 3 steps we can take to access and express our deepest authentic expression.
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When conflict or criticism occurs, we can notice two layers of meaning to create connection: the content and the needs the speaker is holding. When we are able to recognize this --and ideally engage open-heartedly, with curiosity, make clear requests, imagining what they want, no matter how their expression was framed -- we have more opportunity to support the longevity of our relationships, and to decrease our loneliness when together.
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Nonviolent Communication at its core is about the quality of connection that will lead to everybody's needs being met. In this months 'Purpose of NVC' episode, we ask ourselves five questions that help us gain an awareness of where Nonviolent Communication is being used.
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Sharing more vulnerably provides opportunities for fulfilling connection. As social beings we rely on feedback to see our effect on others. We can get that feedback through body language, facial cues and words. To expand your capacity to share more vulnerably you can create supportive conditions and timing. You can ask for feedback by making in-the-moment requests of others and yourself before and after you share.
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When Marshall designed NVC, he said that the purpose of it was to create a quality of connection, that inspires compassionate giving and receiving. The zero step is awakening or remembering your intention to support compassionate giving and receiving. Do this practice exercise to awaken this intention and to roleplay with it in your heart.
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NVC trainer Sarah Peyton explores the process of repairing relationships through the lens of Nonviolent Communication. She emphasizes the importance of self-connection and empathy—both for ourselves and others—when addressing moments of hurt or disconnection.
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Eric offers a very brief but valuable Trainer Tip about persistence practicing NVC, sometimes a small shift in approach can make a big difference.
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Miki speaks to peace activists about connecting with the life vision in those who stimulate pain in them.
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Trainer Tip: When there's conflict if you set the intention to connect and build trust first, you're more likely to move towards resolution. This can be built through offering reflections that captures essence of what's important to each party. Once connection and trust is established, then begin the process of creating strategies and solutions.
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Trainer Tip: One of the swiftest ways to close our hearts is having judgmental thinking or looking to get our way. How open are you when you're in this mode? The goal in peaceful living is to approach our relationships with an open heart. Start conversations today with an intention to connect with other people.
